Jokes with no limit part 1

Todays vibes

1."I can't date a man who doesn't have a car"
Says a lady who baths with one soap till it
becomes the size of a Sim card. My sister, you
need deliverance....
2. My landlord wife had been vomiting since
morning and also spitting, let me quickly travel
jawe..
I cant kill myself..
3. Benue state girls, please it is not Ear force but
Air force. Stop giving me headache!....
4. Money can change your height, even if
you're short they will still invite you to the
high table. # wisdom #will#not#kill#me
5. Nothing takes longer than church
announcements
when you are hungry......you may even remind the pastor that the Bible says "Let my people go"
who can relate

6. My mom put # 1k inside her Bible and the children of Israel took it, now she is looking at me somehow.
7. Just to see if someone's
laptop can fit in my bag
And dis people are shouting
Thief Thief Thief --
8. Thank God!!!! I found my missing #500 inside my sister's purse......I know that my enemies will call me names now
9. just 2weeks in a relationship,all your
clothes are already in his house...............Aunty please is he a
tailor??? Or a dry cleaner
10. stressful relationship can make you so
confused!!!! Can you believe i entered a taxi today
and
forgot to sit down..
11. pls watch me on NTA tonight by 10pm...I'll
pass behind the newscaster,,......
# saynotoweed #
12. some girls will be saying"he is my
world"but this is your fourth world in
2months
My sister are you building a solar system???
13. corruption is when you took your grandma
phone and reduce the brightness and told her
to pay for lighting that her phone brightness
has expired...
Well done oo minister of lighting, little nepa
officer, God is watching you sir
14 .There is a special room in hell for all this mama put that tells you "the kpomo is soft", only for you to get home and discovered that she sold "leather belt"
15.Egg is now #50 in Lagos, please did the fowl lay it through operation or in the labour room
16.When I think that I've seen it all, Boom!!!! Ndifreke weds Araoluwa... # Ndiara 2020#
17.Guys, be wise!!! Not all the ladies wear long gown for beautification, some are using the gown to cover their yam legs and stretch marks
18. Aunty, your name is patience and you lost your virginity at the age of 14 chaiiiiii, what a name misuse
19."London bridge is falling down" please what is our business as Nigerians,....... teachers should stop feeding our children's brain with other countries problem
20.Am tired of Nigerian market women, which one is *bros, buy your sweet bitter leaf for your handsome egusi soup*
21.The day I hated agricultural science as a subject was when my agric teacher defines weed as an
# unwanted_plants ..... if you know you know

22.Aunty, you see that your father's get you refuse to stand a snap with, don't worry, we will see it when we come doe your traditional marriage
23 it your humble boy, # Davidfab , just continue laughing
24.If she keep shouting "faster, harder", my brother, kindly remove your dick and put your leg inside..... Don't kill yourself for nothing.
25.Africans can never rest, even when they die, they still work as ancestors
26.One of my neighbors child scored 250 in jamb last year and MTN remove 100 marks as their credit debt from his scores and gave him 150 jamb score.........
Hmmmm, respect village people ooo
27.Some people are just so dumb, so common "a need in friend is a need friend, no!!! Friend is need is a need of friend, wait!!!! Wait!!! Friend need a need friend, no!no!!no!!! A friend is a need of needs"...... That was how she just confused my destiny with English
28.English student, please what is the English pronunciation of "Hmmmmm, na wa oooo"
29.That moment when you want to stone your friend and the stone mistakenly hit one old woman and she just bend down and pick the stone inside her bag..............bros, no need, just go and buy a new destiny
30.Avoid early morning weed una no hear..........my neighbour just drove his children to his work place and drove himself to his children's school

31.I never wished of becoming a comedian on Facebook but it's because some girls were not replying to our chat, most of us now took up a comedy career, thank God, we are not regretting it now
# fact
32.Just for Nepa to flash light, Boom!!! Igbo boys has ironed 10 shirts......... Igbo kwenu
32.My brother, instead of you giving her #10,000 to go and fix nails on the hand that scored 122 in jamb, why not help her buy small stove, 1 carton of indomie, 1 crate of eggs and pot let her start MISHAI work....
Which number totori your body ??

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